Dekens boy?!

I grew up with 4 sisters and no brothers. It's hard to know what a boy in our family would've looked like. Perhaps he would've looked like the fellow below? I think there is a little more Dekens in him than Chapman but time will tell. I really, really hope that he looks like me as Kai is about 98% Chapman. The 2% Dekens portion is his dimples.

Here are some pictures of me as a baby...

(We both def. have the lack of hair:)

I mean, its not like we look the same but I think Koen is more similar to myself than to Gary. I only have one picture of Gary at this age and I'm not going to scan it now...

Koen is a super drooly pants these days. Not expecting teeth anytime soon as Kai was about 10 months old when he started getting them.

Maybe in the picture below he looks more like me. That was a joke. He really does love being in the bjorn and looking around.

Gary and Kai spent the morning planting seeds and preparing the garden.

I've been talking to Kai over the past few days about what Easter means. It's kind of hard to summarize it to a 2.5 year old kid in language that they understand but here is what he got from it:

God had a boy named Jesus (he doesn't know the term `son')

Jesus died but then he went into heaven with God.

He died so that when we say `sorry', God says, `It's okay, I forgive you'.

And one of the culprits of my CRAZY hay fever is below. I can't take any antihistamines so I've been irrigating my nose with a saline nasal spray. Thinking of getting a netty pot.

Kai always asks me to take pictures of him and then gives this super fake smile. What a punk.

And...another goofy face.

Soon we'll be heading out to the Chapman Easter Egg Hunt and Dinner. Hopefully I don't eat too much chocolate:)

Blessed

Koen is sitting in the bjorn as we speak, sleeping away. My back is just about to break but him having a good nap is more important to me. Not trying to sound like a martyr, if he sleeps well in the day, he's just a happier boy:) Yesterday, I fed him and then 2 hours later, I fed him again and he fell asleep. He then slept for 3 hours in his bed!! This was def. his longest day time nap and I was sooooo happy! He has been sleeping a solid 7-8 hours per night which is just awesome. He did sleep in his bed for an hour this morning (again feeding two hours apart) so I played a bit with our new lens extenders. I'm not sure how useful they will be as they only focus if you are about 2 inches from the subject but it'll be good for ring shots I guess!

(My engagement ring. It's a bit blurry as I couldn't stabilize the lens enough just using one hand. I don't wear my wedding ring...its just a band. It is smaller than my engagement ring and when I was pregnant with Kai my finger were so swollen that I stopped wearing it. On a side note, Gary never wears his ring. Something about teaching PE, playing sport, and it being uncomfortable? )

(Not sure if this is inappropriate but here's a picture of me pulling out my belly fat/excess skin. I'm about 1 day away from starting a serious work out routine because my weight has remained the same for 2 months and if my weight loss post Kai's birth is any indication...I won't be losing any more. The plan is to lose 10lbs and 3% of my body fat in 2 months. I know it's not about weight but a good 10 lbs would make my clothes fit more nicely. Our scale also reads body fat so that's why I added that in there).

I've been thinking a lot about what to do when my maternity leave is over. The plan is to go back to teaching part time in December. I'm concerned about finding daycare for my boys. In the past, we have had 2 great stay at home moms so maybe they could take on 2 kids? I think we could actually manage our mortgage and all that jazz on just Gary's salary but things wouldn't be as comfortable as they are now. Could I, or would I want to, do more studio photography sessions instead? I say studio because then I don't need child care, it's in our basement. I could do it while they are napping or put a little Diego on:) If I did just one shoot a week, that would give me some fun times with editing and learning more in that department. We have been trying to just stick with 1 session per month because of child care and also, we want it to stay fun and a hobby. I do enjoy teaching and being out of the home but it is truly exhausting. Maybe I'm just remembering how it was teaching when I was pregnant and hauling my 8 month self up and down those stairs to face a room of 30 wild grade 9's.

(The ring my mom bought me when i turned 18. Talking about my mom...last night we opened a jar of applesauce that my mom had made. Kai was eating it and we were talking about oma. It brought tears to my eyes that Kai was eating what my mom had made. I think my dad still has some jars. I'll have to get another and just never eat it, although, she would want me to eat it:)

Also, I've been thinking about a 3rd baby. If you have ever done the true colours workshop, I am as gold as you can get (routine, scheduled, time orientated, plan ahead, need control etc). I just like to know, as much as I can, what is going to be happening. Some days, i feel like selling everything that Koen has grown out of and getting rid of all our baby stuff. Other days, like today, when Kai said, `You should have another baby boy!' I think that maybe I should try to do just that. When I was being stitched up, my doctor/ob/gyn/surgeon said that I could maybe have just one more based on the thinness of my uterus. I believe that was the reasoning she gave. I would def. need to check in and figure out what exactly she was talking about as I wasn't 100% with it.

In April of last year we had been trying for nearly a year to get pregnant with Koen. I had just come to the point where I felt peace in the sense that Kai may have been our only biological child. A week later, Koen was conceived. I wish I could tell you the story (yes, of the events surrounding his conception) but I don't want my family to be mortified so if you ever want to know, feel free to ask me:) All I have to say is that I am so thankful to God that He has blessed us with another beautiful, healthy boy. Koen is so special to us and today when he was smiling at Kai, it brought tears to my eyes. I know they won't always get along the best but these guys are going to have a bundle of fun together. Motherhood is tough. Really tough. Emotionally. Physically. I never realized it was a 24/7 job until I was well into it. However, I've always known that I wanted to be a mom so I'm so thankful that God has blessed me with Gary, Kai and Koen.

Flip flops

Today I really realized how little, if any, tv we watch when its sunny out! We walked to the store and the park and played in the back yard. Kai was somehow confused about shorts. I guess he doesn't remember wearing them last summer. He kept saying they were his `sports pants'. Today Kai got to have a special treat. Growing up, we used to have sprinkles on toast...it's a dutch thing. I introduced this to Kai and he loved it (obviously). I was explaining how I'm dutch and Opi is dutch etc. He then asked, `Is daddy a dutch?'.

(Do you see how his tongue is heart shaped? I really wonder how being tongue tied will affect him, if at all)

(He likes facing forward these days...he just chews on the bjorn and stares at everything going on)

I had a great day with the boys, although Koen's need to sleep in the bjorn is driving me nuts. He does not sleep in his bed during the day, no matter how long I let him cry. My back can't handle it and I do like to get a break from the little slobber monster. Usually I try to hold him for about 45 minutes so that he gets a mini nap. I will continue trying to put him in bed during the day and hopefully, one day soon, it'll work. He does fall asleep in the stroller, the only problem is that I have to push the stroller and hold the soother in for 15 minutes. Have you tried pushing a double stroller and walked bent over holding a soother in? Once he is almost alseep, the soother stays in. If he learns to actually hold it in by himself I will be one extra happy camper.

Today Kai saw the sun outside and said `It's sunny! We get to go camping!'. I had told him that once its sunny and warm we could go camping. I had to tell him it will probably be a few more months but he is so pumped to sleep in a tent one day.

Yesterday afternoon, we went to visit our friends, Tessa and Simon, who live out on a ranch in Abbotsford. Kai was so excited to go that he didn't nap. They have 2 dogs that Kai loves and their place is amazingly beautiful...especially in the sun! We were there for just an hour and half but it was such a great time and Kai can't stop talking about it.

When he saw the pond, he started taking off his clothes and said he wanted to go swimming. I let him attempt it and he didn't get in too far before realizing it was kind of cold!

We went for a walk up the hill to have a little picnic. Tessa is carrying Kai in the backpack. I met Tessa at a UBC orientation day and we found out that we were living on the same floor. That was back in 1996...wow. Simon actually lived on our brother floor so I met him just a year later.

These guys love their dogs and Kai loves them too. Tenge, one the left, can run forever. There are trails all around their property that he has created by just going, going, going. Kai kept trying to feed them leaves.

Tessa brought some juice boxes which is the greatest treat ever to Kai. He hasn't really caught on at home that when I give him a drink that is 50% juice and 50% water, it just doesn't taste as good.

Finally, today I made a really fast and easy dinner. It's a crustless spinach quiche. I think next time I would add some ham to it but ya, it was gobbled up pretty fast. I just used cheddar and mozzarella cheese instead of what they asked for. I also made some bread this morning and it is really yummy, just a little more time consuming.
http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Crustless-Spinach-Quiche/Detail.aspx

http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/Simple-Whole-Wheat-Bread/Detail.aspx
Tomorrow there is more sun!! Woohoo. More shorts. More flip flops. Yes.

Sunshine!!

So much fun outside today. I had to leave by 7:20am this morning to get to football. With two little guys (and more importantly one breastfeeding), that meant a very early morning to prepare for 4 hours away. We won our game. Awesome. The rusher's cleats scraped their way down by my achilles...don't think I'll be wearing shoes tomorrow. This is our 9th season playing together, although, I have missed 2 seasons due to being pregnant. I love playing and am pumped that we won 19-0. I even ran in a TD today. I definitely feel sore now and look forward to getting into better shape. Oh man, I am sore. I've decided that I will increase my activity level and just take in more calories. I won't lose any weight but I will hopefully be more fit. When Koen is about 6 months old, I'd like to lose at least 10lbs to be pre-Koen weight. Don't think I will ever be pre-Kai weight again (would require 20lbs loss total and I really can't change my life style all that much).

Kai and I were playing some hockey outside when he saw Opi (my dad). This is seriously how excited he was when he saw him. We had a lot of fun playing outside together. Who doesn't have fun out in the sun? I may have even gotten a tan today:) Time to get the sunscreen out for my fair skinned boys!

(Trying to play hockey with Opi while holding a snack...not the best form)

Loving the sunshine. He picked his clothes out today so the shirt is a bit big (size 4) but he loves it. I think we've saved a bunch of money by having two boys. Koen gets all of Kai's clothes. However, any money saved will go into our grocery bills when they are teenagers!

Pure joy....yet kind of a scary face. This kid can make us laugh and smile but boy oh boy has he ever learned to push our buttons. You know when you see wild kids out in public and secretly think that the parents really need to discipline them more? Our son has too much energy which comes out looking wild. He is also quite imaginative. He is not allowed to have Bubi (his blankie) downstairs so he comes up with a lot of wild excuses to have him downstairs....`Mommy, I have a present for you!' `Mommy, I'm a Bubi ghost!' `Mommy, I'm going on a trip' (Bubi in a suitcase).

Finally, we bought some lens extenders instead of getting a new macro lens. You just attach them between the camera and whatever lens you are using. Kind of fun. We've def. realized they do not work well on little kids who are moving around a lot:)

By the way people, I realize there is nothing really interesting to comment on in this blog entry BUT seriously, my kids are adorable. Leave a comment sometime....

3 Months

I can't believe that Koen is already 3 months! I am loving each day more and more and look forward to what's to come. I'm glad that I am not sad about the stages that have passed. Although, walking with a pregnant friend last week I was thinking how cute she looked and how special it was that she was going to have a baby, and again, I considered #3. But then, I came home. Two seems perfect:) Koen is a wonderful `little' (16lb) boy.

His favourite thing in the world is to be held. He loves it when he is facing towards you and you talk to him. He could stay all day in different people's arms. He doesn't mind the swing or exersaucer but is def. happiest interacting with others.

Kai and Koen don't interact much yet but Kai is looking forward to Koen getting older so that he can help him lift heavy rocks. Koen enjoys watching Kai. Kai likes watching his diaper changes (and acting grossed out every time), putting a soother in Koen's mouth and singing songs for Koen. Kai is known to yell at Koen when he's crying...`KOKOES STOP CRYING!'. Kai still asks about once a week if Koen can go back in my belly. One day I will get a cute picture of the two of them together.

His reflux is pretty much under control. He just spits up all day long but that is easy enough to handle. I've started putting big bibs on his so I don't have to change his clothes all the time. I have football 2X per week for at least 3 hours and it's really hard for me to pump a lot of extra milk. So, last night he had 3 ounces of pumped breastmilk and then just 2 ounces of Good Start Formula. I have heard that this is good for reflux babies because it is easy to digest. Two hours after he took it, he vomitted everything up. Half an hour after that, he vomitted up a whole lot more and I have no idea where it came from. Gary was covered head to toe 2X. Thank goodness for laminate floors and our new steam mop! I really hope that solid foods will stay down when we get to that point! It seriously makes me teary eyed when he's vomitting. I just feel so bad that his tummy is empty and he's hungry but everytime I tried feeding him after that, it would all come up. He handles it well though, he smiled and giggled moments after vomitting. No more formula for this guy. None.

For the past several nights, we have put him down to bed at 10pm while he is completely awake and he fell asleep on his own! This is crazy for us as Kai never did that. He doesn't do it during the day but its the night time sleep that is most important to me! He sleeps about 7 hours straight at night which is awesome. I usually have a really hard time going back to sleep and am up from 4:30-6am which is frustrating but oh well, at least I'm getting about 6-7 hours per night straight!

Today during a bath, Kai dumped a whole bucket of water over Koen's head and he didn't care at all. He is so easy going.

The little cry face....just means, `I'm done being in here, pick me up!'. He has recently been learning how to laugh and it is so cute. I love it. He sort of does it while inhaling which makes it sound funny. I think this guy is going to be laid back, relaxed and easy going. So, he may look a little more like me but probably has Gary's personality. I'm looking forward to the summer and getting outside with these guys a whole lot more. I wonder if Koen will crawl as Kai never did. I'm assuming that since he spends so much time no his belly, he will learn how. Kai never went on his tummy so he never crawled or really rolled, he just went right to walking. Happy 3 months Kokoes, we love you!!!

Bug Parts

In the past few years, I kind of wanted to get a tattoo which would symbolize two huge things my life; my mom and being a mom. I wanted to get a symbol of motherhood. I have found out though that Gary is really not into tattoos and it's not that I really wanted one, I just want some way to always remember my mom. I have a ring that she gave me and maybe that will just be it. Anyway, I decided to get this necklace made (off of etsy.com) and it came today. I think it's cute.

We went bowling last night with our care group and I have to say 2 things:

1. I've never gotten so many strikes and spares

2. I pulled some muscles and I felt more sore today than I did after a 5km run:)

(Kai asked if we could go outside so I could take pictures of him)

Koen and Kai are doing good and we've been back into our routine now that Gary is back at school. Kai is loving learning. Yesterday he learned the three parts of the bug and can say and point them out on his toy bug; head, thorax and abdomen. I have a cute video of it but the format can't be uploaded and I don't have the time to figure it out right now. Today he was learning about the largest bone (femur) and strongest muscle (tongue) in the body. I love it.

(I think he looks alot like his Chapman cousin, Jayden, in this picture)

I went to see if I could find any clothes tonight and ended up coming home with a food processor. We've thought about getting one for a long time and I found a Kitchen Aid one at Superstore $60 off so I got it. I hope we use it!!!

This kid just loves the bjorn with a soother. After 45 minutes today, I took him out and laid him on my lap with his soother in and then I read for an hour (Kai was napping). This may have to be what we do for a few more months. I weighed Koen today...16lbs. Big boy. Started getting all the 6-12 month clothes out.

And finally...FOOTBALL PRACTICE TOMORROW AND THEN OUR FIRST GAME ON SATURDAY. SO NERVOUS. SO EXCITED. LOVE IT. Kai can't wait to come to a game. Bon nuit!

Random

A bunch of random stuff:

a. Any suggestions for a healthy snack that I don't need to prepare? I love eating homemade muffins but am getting sick of making them all the time. I am just hungry all the time and need a filling, healthy snack I can just grab and eat while holding Koen in the bjorn. I know I could just eat carrots or apples but they do not fill me up.

b. Fenugreek. Wow. If you are needing to increase your milk supply, this stuff works. You take 6 pills a day and within 24 hours, you've got enough milk. It is sold to help in digestion so it um, really aids you in that department too:) I'm not sure if that is what did it or if it was drinking and resting a lot, but I've continued taking a bit, especially if I'm exercising more. The downfall is that you smell like fenugreek. It comes out in your sweat, breath, urine etc. You can get it at health food stores...90 pills for $10. I think I will stop taking it if someone says that something smells funny when I'm around them:)

(so hard to get smiles out of him when I'm holding the camera...I'll need to get Gary to take pictures while I get him to smile. Gary says that Koen has dumbo ears, maybe they do stick out a bit:))

c. Having Gary home for 2 weeks has been really good for all of us. Kai got some special one on one time with each of us and I got a break in the mornings. I got to go for a run whenever I wanted! I hope Gary felt that he got some rest. Koen does not nap in the day unless we are carrying him, this means he has maybe three 45 minute naps during the day. At night, he sleeps so well in his bed. I don't understand him. He has been doing so well at night, sleeping 8 hours straight...until last night. He was up to eat 3 times and he has been eating every 2 hours today. Growth spurt I'm guessing.

(two cute dimples)
d. Kai is a wild boy. He is just go, go, go all the time. He also uses a TON of inflection when he talks which makes him so funny to me. Gary bought him some more train tracks and trains for his table and he is loving it. We set it up in our unfinished basement and he loves going down there...only thing is that he wants one of us to always play with him. I said, `Kai, you need a friend to play with.' and he said, `You're my friend mommy!'. Today he was playing with a small toy and he said `Mommy, this is small like plankton'. Ah, love it. Also, in the garage he said, `Mommy, dere's (there's) a quitter by the door!' A quitter? What's a quitter? I found out that it is a CRITTER. There was a huge beetle. Today he had to apologize for hitting me in the head with a ball. I said `I forgive you Kai'. He said, `I forgive you too Mommy'. His potty training has gone so well, I'm so proud of him.

e. Had football practice on Saturday. Love it. Love exercise. Love team sports. Love being outside. Love that my ability is still there. I told Kai that my friend Lisa got a bloody lip at football and he said, `We should pray for Lisa'. What a cutie.

f. I've been struggling with the loss of my mom lately. In May, it will be 3 years since she passed away. I'm not very sad, I'm frustrated. I'm frustrated that she is not there for me for my physical/practical and emotional needs. My mom was a practical woman and she could've helped out with child care/babysitting which seems to keep being a problem for us (if you know of any good babysitters in our area, let me know!). Their house is across the street from us, do you know how convenient that would've been? She would've been here to listen, care, encourage and compliment me. Thankfully I do have a lot of support, but still, I know she cared about me more than anyone else in my life does. She was so proud of me. I am so thankful for what she did provide in my life; she was a great example of what a mother and wife should be. If only she was here just a little bit longer....

g. I didn't mean to end on a sad note so...um...let's see. When I was putting Kai to bed the other day, I noticed a bunch of marks on the wall. I asked him what they were from and he said (with the hugest grin) `My boogies!'. Gross. Is that appropriate? Probably not.

Days 10 & 11

On Wednesday morning, we were up and out of the house within 10 minutes to catch the 7:45am ferry to the island. We just went for the day to visit my oma and uncle Al in Port Alberni.

Oma turned 86 this weekend and she is my mom's mom. I have great memories of going to Port Alberni with my family growing up. It was difficult explaining to Kai that this is my oma, his great oma, and that his oma is in heaven. I had told Kai that they are older so he needs to sit and talk quietly while we were there. He just kept asking, `But why are they old?'. Kai also got into the whole `Are we there yet?' routine but travelled very well, it helps to have the ferry ride in the middle. Can't wait for our road trip through BC and the Alaskan panhandle in 1.5 years...we'll def. get some dvd players for our van by then:)

(That is a baby under my sweatshirt in case you were wondering)

On the way back, we walked through Cathedral Grove to check out the huge trees. Kai loved running around and had a fabulous melt down when getting him back into the van.

I sat in the back of the van to hold the soother in Koen's mouth. He didn't cry at all in the whole 12 hour trip....he can hold the soother in for maybe 1-5 minutes and we are working on this, who knew how fabulous a soother could be! I love our van. Love it. So useful and comfortable. Love it!!!

Yesterday we had a photo shoot in Fort Langley (and got some great pictures, I love them!) and then in the afternoon we took some pictures of our friends at Campbell Valley so we took our boys along. Kai loved it there and especially loved copying and running after their 2 older boys.

Days 7-9

Wow. So tired. Will be brief. This weekend Maria and Mark got married and I was a bridesmaid in their wedding. It was a beautiful day (weather included) and I wish I could've taken pictures! The whole time I was thinking `that would be a beautiful picture' but I didn't bring my camera because I was in the wedding and also I didn't want to impose on the photographer:) It was cool to be on the other end of the camera and see how other people do it. We had our photos done at Crescent Beach and the wedding and reception were at the Surrey Art Center. Gary took pictures at the reception so I'll include one of those here. I'd include more but they should probably see them first:) I can't wait to see the wedding photos!

(instead of cake they had chocolate mousse...Mark's favourite. I love it too!)

I thought everything was very well thought out and creative. In their vows, Mark said he would eat salad, go for long walks and watch less tv. Maria said she would make good salads, hold his hand on long walks and watch a little more tv to spend more time with him. If Mark decides to not go on the long walks, that's okay with me because Maria has now moved about 2km's away so now we can meet halfway and go for walks!

Being in the wedding meant I was away from Koen most of the day. I missed 3 feeds (he took a bottle..yippee! I had pumped 4 bottles worth over the past month, I haven't had much extra lately) and he was brought to me twice for a quick feed in the back of the minivan. Since then, my milk supply is nearly gone. I think its because I missed feeds, didn't drink enough water, and was really exhausted. So, I'm not going for a run today, I'm going to drink lots of water, and take fenugreek pills.

Today we went to the Aquarium. It should've taken 45 minutes to get there but it took about 2 (frustrating) hours based on today's traffic. Thank goodness Koen only cried for about half an hour. The aquarium was soooo perfect for Kai. He has a short attention span, needs to run around and he loves animals. So....he just ran and ran and wanted to see more and more animals. Koen behaved nicely and we had a good time. It's amazing how different Kai is from Ani (my niece). We took her out for dinner last night. Ani sat nicely and Kai ran around wildy and was throwing things. Seriously, we do discipline and he is well behaved most of the time. However, he really cannot sit still and I don't know if he'll always be like this or whether energetic kids calm down at a certain age....if not, his poor teachers....

Kai wanted an octopus and seastar. I'm surprised he sat and got his hand painted but he loved it.

Koen is really into the soother except he can't hold it in by himself so we have to hold it. He falls asleep without it but if we hold him in the bjorn and hold a soother in his mouth, he falls asleep within 10 minutes. Kind of ridiculous but whatever works. I bought Koen a new extra firm crib mattress yesterday. He always sleeps on his tummy so I wanted to make sure we were doing everything we could to prevent SIDS.

The new jellyfish section is pretty cool...

All that's left for Spring Break are three photo shoots and a trip to the island. I'm really hoping the weather improves as we had to cancel several shoots last week. Looking forward to the summer...